On unhappiness as a story
Feb. 23rd, 2026 12:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
posicScott D. Clary writes in Facebook -- https://www.facebook.com/scottdclarypage/posts/pfbid0FHKKDdDh7SNHQWicNPiQJUDbvSyqbUhRpKJ6zgd9bwn73X4Ph4C6wTGR6Ce1YdFul :
Most unhappiness is not about what's actually missing. It's about the story you're telling about what's missing. Two people in the same situation can experience it completely differently based on the meaning they're giving it. The situation is fixed. The interpretation is negotiable.
***
No, unhappiness is not about a story you are telling. It is about the gap between the situation and the person's actual preferences and life goals.
The preferences and life goals vary from person to person, and they are not really negotiable. One can change the story one is telling and start pretending to be happy, but it does not make one happy.
No, the situation is not fixed. Your sense of unhappiness stimulates you to work hard and take risks in order to change the situation and replace it with one that would better align with your preferences and life goals.
Most unhappiness is not about what's actually missing. It's about the story you're telling about what's missing. Two people in the same situation can experience it completely differently based on the meaning they're giving it. The situation is fixed. The interpretation is negotiable.
***
No, unhappiness is not about a story you are telling. It is about the gap between the situation and the person's actual preferences and life goals.
The preferences and life goals vary from person to person, and they are not really negotiable. One can change the story one is telling and start pretending to be happy, but it does not make one happy.
No, the situation is not fixed. Your sense of unhappiness stimulates you to work hard and take risks in order to change the situation and replace it with one that would better align with your preferences and life goals.
